so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize
