we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
she pinky promised me she was 18
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
It's rum buckets o'clock
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize