Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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