So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize
