Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
