I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
