Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
why do cheetos always look like penises
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
