well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I'm like, not good at living.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
