I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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