addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
