Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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