the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize