he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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