you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
