Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
