She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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