Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I need moral support for this bender
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
