What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize