I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
it was like eating out sand paper
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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