Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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