the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
