READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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