he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
