You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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