I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
