I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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