you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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