i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I deserve this hangover.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize