So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
