i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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