she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
