What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize