Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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