I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
