plz talk dirty to me
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
so much tequila, so little girl.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
