Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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