Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
