I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize