I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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