i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just had sex on a roof
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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