ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize