i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
