Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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