hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
