I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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