We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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