I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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