I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
