There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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