he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
